Conversation between a Boy and a Girl- Before Marriage and After Marriage

Conversation between a Boy and a Girl- Before Marriage and After Marriage:

Before Marriage:

Boy: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.

Girl: Do you want me to leave?

Boy: No! Don't even think about it.

Girl: Do you love me?

Boy: Of course! Over and over!

Girl: Have you ever cheated on me?

Boy: No! Why are you even asking?

Girl: Will you kiss me?

Boy: Every chance I get!

Girl: Will you hit me?

Boy: Are you crazy! I'm not that kind of person!

Girl: Can I trust you?

Boy: Yes.

Girl: Darling!

After Marriage......

........

Merely read from Bottom to Top.

Three more Sardar Jokes

Sardar's Son was filling application form.

In Form, it was asked about Mother Tongue.

Son asked Dad what should I write here?

Dad says write VERY LONG.

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Chemical symbols and Sardar

Professor: Chemical symbol of Barium?

Sardar: BA

Professor: For Sodium?

Sardar: NA

Professor:What will we get if 1 atom of BA and 2 atoms of NA combined?

Sardar: BANANA

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Two Sardar Brothers were in the same class.

Teacher: Why You wrote your Father's name different?

Boys: Madam, otherwise u will say We've Copied.

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Positive Attitude

With a BAD ATTITUDE,

You can never have a POSITIVE Day

And

With a POSITIVE ATTITUDE,

You can never have a BAD Day.

So the Choice is Yours.

Great Mistake of Human Beings

The big error or fault of most of human beings:

"We Listen Half,

Understand Quarter

and Tell Double".

Short but Inspiring Lines

FACE THE FAILURES

until the

FAILURE FAILS

to

FACE YOU.

Five Funny Jokes

Teacher: What is meant by the serial killer?

Student: The person who puts poison in someone’s cereal.

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Man: Do you know about vampire’s favorite desert?

Boy: No.

Man: The man with high sugar level and high blood pressure.

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Woman: How can I stop a maxican from robbing my house?

Second woman: Its simple, put up the help wanted sign there.

No one enters the house.

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On the valentine day, a bat is hanging with his female bat friend.

He said to her, it’s a fun to hang around with you.

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The smoker suffering from lungs cancer, woke up from 16 months coma.

Do you know what did he want first?

 “A cigarette”.

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Jokes on Husband and Wife.

A recently fired Stock trader said:-
“This is worse than divorce,  I have lost everything and
I still have my Wife”.

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Judge: Why did u shoot Your Wife instead of shooting her Lover?

Sardar:Your honour, it’s easier to shoot a woman once, than shooting one man every week.

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Wife:What is 10 years with me?

Husband: A Second.

Wife:What is $1000 for me?

Husband: A Coin.

Wife: OK, then give me a Coin.

Husband:Wait a Second.

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Short Jokes

Man: How old is your father?
Boy: As old as me.
Man : How can that be?
Boy: He became a father only when I was born.
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Lady : Is this my train?
Station Master : No, it belongs to the Railway Company.
Lady : Don't try to be funny. I mean to ask if I can take this train to New Delhi.
Station Master : No Madam, I'm afraid it's too heavy.
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A drunkard was brought to court.
Just before the trial there was a commotion in the gallery.
The judge pounded the gravel on his table and shouted, "Order, order."
The drunkard immediately responded, "Thank you, your honor, 

I'll have a scotch and soda."

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Customer :Waiter, do you serve crabs?
Waiter :Please sit down sir, we serve everyone.
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Customer:Waiter, is this a lamb chop or pork chop?
Waiter:Can't you tell the difference by taste?
Customer:No, I can't.
Waiter:Then does it really matter?
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Little Susie came running into the house after school one day, shouting,
"Daddy!Daddy! I got a 100 in school today!"
"That's great, Sweetheart," said her daddy.
"Come in to the living room and tell me about it."
"Well, "began the confession, "I got 50 in spelling, 30 in math's and 20 in science."
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Customer:Waiter, there's a dead beetle in my soup.
Waiter:Yes sir, they are not very good swimmers.
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Customer:Waiter, there's a fly in my soup.
Waiter:That' s all right sir, he won't drink much.
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Waiter: I've stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog's leg.
Customer: Don't tell me your problems. Give the menu card.
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Customer:Waiter, there's a fly swimming in my soup.
Waiter: So what do you expect me to do, call a lifeguard?
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Customer :Waiter, what's the meaning of this fly in my tea up?
Waiter :I wouldn't know sir, I'm a waiter, not a fortune teller.
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1st thief :Oh ! The police is here. Quick! Jump out of the window!
2nd thief:But this is the 13th floor.
1st thief :Hurry! this is no time for superstitions.
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Customer:Waiter, this soup tastes funny.
Waiter: Funny? But then why aren't you laughing?
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Teacher : Peter, why are you late for school again?
Peter: Well, Miss, I dreamed that I was playing football and
the game went into extra time.
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An absent-minded man went to see a psychiatrist.
'My trouble is,' he said, 'that I keep forgetting things.'
'How long has this been going on?' asked the psychiatrist.
'How long has what been going on?' said the man.
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Girl : Do you love me?
Boy: Yes Dear.
Girl: Would you die for me?
Boy :No, mine is undying love.
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Wife : Do you want dinner?
Husband:Sure, what are my choices?
Wife :Yes and no.
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Why Husband avoid answers or replies to Wife's Questions?

Wife:  What would you do if I die? Would you get married again?
Husband: Definitely not!

Wife: Why not? Don't you like being married?
Husband: Of course I do.

Wife: Then why wouldn't you remarry?
Husband: Okay, okay, I'd get married again.

Wife: You would?
Husband: .......?

Wife: Would you live in our house?
Husband: Sure, it's a great house.

Wife: Would you sleep with her in our bed?
Husband: Where else would we sleep?

Wife: Would you let her drive my car?
Husband: Probably, it is almost new.

Wife: Would you replace my pictures with hers?
Husband: That would seem like the proper thing to do.

Wife: Would you give her my jewelry?
Husband: No, I'm sure she'd want her own.

Wife: Would she wear my shoes?
Husband: No, her size is 6.

Wife: ...Silence.
Husband: Shit.

Ultimate Truth of Life

"Success Kisses YOU in Private"

But,

"Failure Always kicks YOU in Public".

Love Talking Between Husband and Wife

Wife: I wish I was a newspaper,

So I'd be in your hands all day.

Husband: I too wish that you were a newspaper, So I could have a new one everyday.

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Doctor: Your husband needs rest and peace. Here are some sleeping pills.

Wife: When must I give them to him?

Doctor: They are for you.

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Wife: I had to marry you to find out how stupid you are.

Husband: You should have known it the minute I asked you to marry me.

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Husband: Today is Sunday & I have to enjoy it. So, I bought 3 movie tickets.

Wife: Why Three?

Husband: For you and your parents.

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Wife: What will you give me if I climb the great Mount Everest?

Husband: A lovely Push...!!!

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Q: What is the most effective way to remember your wife's birthday?

A: Just forget it once and you will never forget it again.

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After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, You know, I was a fool when I married you.

The husband replied, "Yes dear, but I was in love and didn't notice.

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Husband and Wife Jokes

Husband: Do you know the meaning of WIFE?

It means, Without Information, Fighting Every time!

Wife: No darling, it means,

With Idiot For Ever

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Wife: I wish I was a newspaper,

So I'd be in your hands all day.

Husband: I too wish that you were a newspaper,

So I could have a new one everyday.

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Doctor: Your husband needs rest and peace.
Here are some sleeping Pills.

Wife: When must I give them to him?

Doctor: They are for you.

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Husband: Today is Sunday & I have to enjoy it.

So I bought 3 movie tickets.

Wife: Why Three?

Husband: For you and your parents

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Wife: What will you give me if I climb the great Mount Everest?

Husband: A lovely Push...!!!

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Q: What is the most effective way to remember your wife's birthday?

A: Just forget it once and you will never forget it again

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After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband,

You know, I was a fool when I married you.

The husband replied, "Yes dear, but I was in love and didn't notice.

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Complete and Finished

What is the difference between "COMPLETE" and "FINISHED"?

If you find Good Wife, You are COMPLETE

otherwise, You are FINISHED.

Motivation- Secrets of Success

When I woke up this morning lying in bed, I was asking myself;
What are some of the secrets of success in life?
I found the answer right there, in my very room.

The Fan said Be Cool
The Roof said Aim High
The Window said See the World
The Clock said Every Minute is Precious
The Mirror said Reflect Before You Act
The Calendar said Be Up-to-Date
The Door said Push Hard for Your Goals.

So,

Carry a Heart that Never Hates.

Carry a Smile that Never Fades.

Carry a Touch that Never Hurts.

BEAUTY OF FRIENDSHIP

Alone i can SAY, but together we can SHOUT.

Alone i can SMILE, but together we can LAUGH.

Alone i can ENJOY, but together we can CELEBRATE.

That's beauty of FRIENDSHIP.

Who got the Contract

Three contractors . .

One from India, another from Germany and the third from England are bidding to repair the White House fence.

A senior White House official takes them to examine it.

The English contractor : takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works on some figures with a pencil. "Well," he says. "I figure the job will cost $900 . . . $400 for materials, $400 for labour and $100 profit for me."

The German contractor : also does some measuring and figuring, then says, "I can do this job for $700 . . . $300 for materials, $300 for my crew and $100 profit for me."

The Indian contractor doesn't measure or do any figuring, but leans over to the White House official and whispers: "$2,700."

The official incredulously says, "You didn't even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?"

"Easy," the Indian explains, "$1,000 for you, $1,000 for me and we hire the guy from Germany to do the work!"

Guess who got the contract...........!!

Two Gifts

1. When Your Family Members understands You as a Friend.
2. When Your Friend Accepts You as one of their Family Members.
**SMS**

Beauty of Friendship

Alone I can SAY, but together we can SHOUT.

Alone I can SMILE but togther we Can LAUGH.

Alone I can ENJOY but 2gthr we can CELBRATE.

That's beauty of FRIENDSHIP.

Meaning of ABCDEFG

The Meaning of, "A B C D E F G"
A Boy Can Do Everything For Girl.










Reverse the Meaning of , "G F E D C B A"
Girl Forgot Everything Done & Catches new Boy Again.

Johny Recharged

Johny Johny

Yes Papa

Private Company

Yes Papa


Any Motivation

No Papa

Many Tension

Yes Papa

Do u Sleep well

No Papa

Onsite Opportunity

No papa

Increment

Ha ha ha.........